Y’all know I love my kids.
Caroline is smart, organized and amazes me with the things she notices. (I never timed commercials on TV. But she does. Did y’all know that the Andy Griffith show has commercials exactly 15 minutes into it?)
Claire is snuggly and polite and constantly compliments me. It’s like I have a little cheerleading squad following me around. That is pretty cool.
But. Oh. My. Goodness.
They have been fighting non stop. Arguing about every little thing. Sometimes it comes to wrassling and then someone comes wailing to me. That someone is usually Claire, as sassy as she can be she refuses to fight back…unless there is a stick. She will/has totally hit Caroline with a stick…then it’s Caroline doing the wailing
Mommyyyyyyyy – she won’t let me use the pink crayon!
Mommyyyyyyyy – she’s not sharing the paper!
Mommyyyyyyyy – she tried to wear my socks!
It’s enough to drive a sane person batty. And I’m not sure I was sane to start with.
The craziest part of it is, if I separate them, within minutes each is hearbroken missing her sister. And the tears and wailing start again. I miss sissy! If only I could play with my sister I would be so happy! We will never fight again!
I’ve totally tried to teach them positive conflict resolution. None of it has ever been heard.
So waving the white flag on teachable moments and clinging to my lucidity my solution is typically to send them outside, where their shrieks and complaining are muffled by the great outdoors. Usually I ban them from the back porch where I perch to survey them and only intervene if bodily harm looks imminent.
But they are learning conflict resolution, right? Right?!
But at the end of the day when I’m at my wit’s end, they say their bedtime prayers.
Caroline says the prayer, and Claire with her eyes closed puts her hand on her sister and prays with her. It’s a glimmer of hope that someday, the things we are teaching them might sink in.
Maybe.
I think my next step will be to make them wear a big “get along” shirt and do things together every time they fight. We’ve not done that in a while.
Y’all pray for me!
Between Three Waters 