Sometimes life wears you down.

The daily grind of our work schedules is tiring. Transporting kids, parenting, home upkeep, cooking, cleaning, just trying to keep up…well you know. You do it too.

In the last few weeks, I’ve had the opportunity to be refreshed. Dear family has made the effort to travel some pretty far distances to visit me.

From North Carolina my Aunt and Uncle came and stayed entirely too short of a time. They loved on the girls and encouraged Lynn and I. Even the dog got attention and fell in love with them. They fit seamlessly into our home and lives, and went to church with us. All of us felt thoroughly loved by them, and at least three of us cried in the driveway when they pulled out to go home.

From the “far away land” of Washington State came my cousin Carla. We laughed, had constant great conversation and laughed more until we couldn’t breathe. When she flew out I felt like I had gained a sister and a trusted confident.

I was able to take my leave from work to enjoy these visits.

And then more leave to spend fall break with my girls. Almost two full weeks in total.

The girls are fortunate enough to have doting grandparents they see nearly every day. They are crazy about their Memaw and Papaw…and coconspirators in a whole lot of mischief.

With time to breathe we were able to enjoy good friends every day and went to the zoo, to the mountains, rode horses, went out to eat, swam and went hiking.

The girls have so many people that love them, and I had time to look around and notice all the friends I am lucky enough to have.

Of course Lynn has been busy with fall harvest and hasn’t gotten a break…but when Mama’s happy…it makes the house run smoother.

It’s been a beautiful break. I’m a little sad that tomorrow we go back to our regular lives, but I’m refreshed and ready to tackle it with enthusiasm.

The girls are missing their friends at school and daycare and ready to “go learn”.

Have a great week friends. Remember to take time to enjoy what is important.

Sweet Caroline started tearing up at home this morning.

I used my one superpower (which is distraction. I can distract with the best of them) to help her hold it together until we got in the car.

I frantically whispered a prayer as I walked around the car to get in the drivers seat… “Lord help me. Lord help her!”.

As I backed out of the garage, I heard a little quivery voice “Mama?? Can we listen to bad music and drive slow with the windows down?” (She is of the opinion that I have poor taste in music. Too bad she’s WRONG.)

I smiled. “You WANT to do that?”

“Yes Mama.” She nodded.

“Ok Baby. But today instead of driving slow with rap music, we are driving FAST with ROCK music”

She giggled. “Why”

I answered “Because THAT is how my crazy is leaning this morning”

So I cranked it up (to a safe decibel level – remember I have a crappy sound system in the mom-car) And drove FAST. (Aka, the speed limit)

I looked back. She was doing the dance I showed her last week on the way to school. To the song Born to be wild.

“Mama! Shoulder, other shoulder and shake it!”

So I joined in. And we shook it. We sang. We tossed our hair.

ALL the way to her school.

She laughed the whole way.

It was almost as invigorating as coffee. Almost.

A schoolbus turned in by us at the stop sign. I turned UP the Whitesnake on the radio, rolled DOWN the windows and me and my reserved, appropriate child waved and cheered at the kids on the bus. A few waved and cheered back.

As we turned onto the road her school is on, a slow rock ballad came on. So I changed the station and it was 2-Pac Keep Ya Head Up YES I know he is/was not in any way, shape or form a role model for children. The hook of the song goes like this

Keep ya head up, ooh child

Things are gonna get easier

Keep ya head up, ooh child

Things’ll get brighter

Keep ya head up, ooh child

Things are gonna get easier

Keep ya head up, ooh child

Things’ll get brighter

So those are the words my kid was singing as we drove up to the school.

As we went in the classroom we saw the teacher had laid out each student’s name on their assigned desks to copy and work on handwriting.

To keep Caroline’s jovial mood going I turned to her, and a little too loudly and a touch dramatically said “LOOK! You get to pick out a new name today! Which one do you like best?!!”

Caroline laughed “NO Mama! We each find our OWN name!”

Me as I pointed to a random desk “Are you SURE???! This name here is beautiful! Do you want to trade names?”

She giggled and asked for a kiss. So again today, I blew a big, wet, loud raspberry on her little dimpled cheek.

She trotted to her REAL desk, and started on her work. “Have a good day Mama! Please be good!”

“Have a good day baby! Have a lot of fun! Don’t work too hard!”

As I walked to the car, I realized that God had answered my desperate whispered prayer this morning…and he used 2-Pac to do it. And that thought made me laugh out loud. The parents entering the school looked at me. So I waved to them and grinned. I think its safe to say I’ve cemented my status as the crazy parent of the kindergarten.

But today, the crazy kindergarten mom is what my girl needed. And it just so happens that THAT is exactly how I was made.

There have been many, many times I have wished I had a more subdued outlook on life. That I was quiet, meek and full of sweetness and grace. But today, I am incredibly thankful that by nature I am NOT those things. Perhaps when God made me, he had this exact moment in mind. And that has had me smiling all morning.

I’m starting this week full of gratitude for the things I don’t control. I am also appreciative of the chance to bond with my little “Type A / perfectionist” daughter.

Have a fantastic Monday friends.

Caroline told us “all her dreams came true” this weekend.

This is King, a wiggly rough coated collie pup (like Lassie) bought with her money from bottles calves she’s raised.

She’s been saving for a dog since she was going on 3. I thought it was phase and she would forget about it. I was wrong. When people would give her birthday money…it went into the bank “for a dog”. When she found spare change “Gotta save it for a dog. Dogs are expensive.” At some point Lynn and I felt like a dog needed to happen for her.

She loves him. And he has selected her as “his person”. They run, snuggle, play and she reads sight word books to him.

We have started teaching him a couple basic obedience things, but of course that will take time.

On the other hand…Claire despises the thought of any animal touching her. (Which is a rough lot in life for a farmers daughter.) She especially despises the thought of a dog licking her.

So if you were out in front of church this morning and heard Claire shout “LICK-HER” that is what she was shouting about. She was NOT talking about liquor!!!! I saw several people notice, so I just wanted to make that clear. Our kids are not booze-hounds.

When Caroline and King are near Claire, she either climbs to the top of the slide or runs in the house and slams and LOCKS the door screeching “Don’t let him lick me! Nooooo!” Yesterday she spent most of the day at the top of the slide, and had Caroline bring her snacks and things to drink. (Again. NOT liquor. I’m talking juice boxes.)

When I hold King with both hands Claire will pet him. Otherwise, nope. Not gonna happen.

It will be interesting to see how long it takes her to come around. She was like that with the cat, “Kitty” but finally decided she loved her.

Caroline is on cloud nine. Lynn and I have so much enjoyed watching her. Claire has provided some amusement too with her “I’m just going to stay in my castle then” attitude. (She calls the top of her slide the castle)

Have a great week!!

This is my first rodeo.

I have been dreading Caroline starting kindergarten since I was on maternity leave with her. Y’all already knew I am crazy like that. No surprised there.

Everyone told me I would cry. It would be hard. I would miss her so much. And they look so little when you walk away.

I must be a bad mother because I felt none of those things.

When her Daddy and I left her at Kindergarten on her first day, I looked over my shoulder and saw a kid that would be a-okay.

Maybe it’s because I’ve seen her flourish because of fantastic preschool teachers. Or perhaps its because I have the special privilege with my job to be in the school she is attending on a regular basis and I have been impressed with what I’ve observed. Or MAYBE it’s because I have a small army of spies at the school willing to sneak by and check on her and text me updates on the regular.

At least that’s what I told myself, to make the mom-guilt from the lack of worry subside.

The Mom guilt is the WORST. You feel guilt for everything…not feeding them home cooked lunches made from scratch, not making constant eye contact, being a working parent instead of a stay-at-home mom, not painting their fingernails every time they ask. All the things cause mom guilt. And if you don’t feel guilty, then you feel guilt for NOT feeling guilty. Mom guilt is from the devil, I have no question.

I had a moment shopping alone for school supplies that my eyes had a little mist thinking of how much she would accomplish this year….

But beyond that?

I remembered the pure excitement of the grand new adventure that kindergarten provided for me when I was 4. And Caroline is a whole year older than I was and probably 10 years more responsible than I was at that age.

I am so proud of her progress so far. And proud of the kid she is with her strong opinions, boundless confidence, and tender heart.

I am excited to see what kinds of things she learns from her teachers.

I am challenged as a person and a mother daily by this kid. She makes me grow in ways I never would have if I was not given the gift of being her Mama.

I am tasked with helping her learn to show kindness to those around her. This year, at the tender age of 5 she will get to begin learning to show kindness to those who themselves might not be kind. Because she will meet those people this year. And that will be new.

What a challenge. What an opportunity for growth.

It is daunting. But she is so much more than prepared, and so much more than capable. And I am thrilled to have the opportunity to help her with that challenge.

I might be am a a Pollyanna…but I truly believe that in order to change the world – you have to be a kind and compassionate person. Even more so for leaders. Even though I am her Mama, and I know for a fact I am biased, I see a lot of leadership potential in sweet Caroline. She has in her little heart a drive for fairness and is already so passionate about making things better. And we get to start that process together beginning now. Honestly, up until this point it has been exhausting parenting her. But now, she will get to begin exercising these skills. She is going to thrive.

Of course she will learn academics. That’s the easy part. Despite my lack of math skills even I know 2+2 will always be 4. But when a friend hurts her feelings about something… responding kindly, firmly and being willing to move forward will be a much bigger task. Plus, Lynn is smart so I plan on making him “homework boss”. (I haven’t surprised him with this bit of information yet. Ha!)

So yes. I am excited, and happy and a little nervous about the challenges this year of new beginnings will bring.

Sad? No.

Scared? Definitely not. I have a lot of confidence in my sweet girl.

Intimidated? Nope. This kid can handle it. And if not she’s got me as backup.

I have no doubts she will fail at things. She won’t be able to read chapter books by Halloween. She will ruin a few art projects. She will without a doubt boss around her classmates too much. There will be tears, and meltdowns and belligerence. But this is a learning time. And it is a challenge my girl is so ready to take on.

Thanks for reading friends.

“I’ll never put a leash on MY kid”….my pre-kid self thought smugly.

I’m pretty sure God shook His head at me that day

And then I had Claire.

Good golly day that kid is wild.

In the past 24 hours she has

• Danced on the AC unit outside while playing the kazoo
• Leapt off a swing and bit a hole in her tounge (she didn’t cry, just yelled in frustration when I wouldn’t let her stand on the swing again to “finish her trick”)
• Walked up and down the back of the couch multiple times…twice backwards with her eyes closed
• Jumped off the dining room table
• Jumped off the kitchen table
• Climbed the chain link fence using her toes and fingers
• Tried to touch the ceiling on the back porch

And that’s just what she’s done while I’ve been watching. I can’t imagine what she does while I’m distracted.

I have repented of my judgemental ways and I need a kid leash…though she would probably just chew through it and run off. Just kidding….kind of.

I love her little free-spirited wild self.